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Funny Experiences

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Unread post by Jock » Thu Apr 21, 2005 3:49 pm

Good story. I read in a book once that you know an elephant is serious about his charge when he puts his ears out and folds up his trunk, just like that one. (Great picture). I must admit, since learning that, I have not had the nerve to try it out. If an elephant tells me to push off, I push off. End of discussion.
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Unread post by madach » Mon Jul 11, 2005 3:51 pm

Hahaha, that was one of the funniest ellies I've seen uptill now in Kruger. He was very determined not to let anyone through. We were about 10km from the Lower Sabie low waterbridge and DQ and I wanted to go to Lower Sabie. We waited for about 15 minutes and then I decided to take my chances with him because else I had to drive all the way back to Tsokwane and then down to Skukuza to get to Lower Sabie.

We got through all right, but the ellie wasn't very impressed.

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Unread post by Foxy » Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:11 pm

In April this year between Skukuza and Berg n Dal some Germany tourists asked us "are those reindeer" - they were kudu's in the distance.

Also had the fall asleep saga between Letaba and Olifants one afternoon, the car we had just passed must have wondered what was going on when we started zigzagging madly across the road, while the driver was screamed at to wake up and arms flying all over. Not very funny as there was quite a drop down on both sides of the road - but certainly woke us all up. That was just after the floods and only tar road could be used and little to see.

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Unread post by Meandering Mouse » Wed Jul 13, 2005 9:41 pm

Most heart stoping moment with an ellie.
About 2kms from Satara and my husband sees an ellie ambling slowly up a curb.
We stop to look at this awesome beast. Massive young male.
He then takes umbriage at our intrusion. We had the flapping ears, the loud trumpet, the loose bowels...
His trunk was right against our window.
I was driving, no where to turn.
Suddenly he lost interest and moved on.
"Wow", says my four year old,"did you see that big willie?"
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Unread post by Bushmad » Sat Nov 26, 2005 12:58 pm

Some of the most memorable experiences we have in Kruger involve other people...since wer'e all in such a good mood we tend laugh more readily and more fully when we're there!

Heres one of mine...It was late afternoon and we were about to cross the bridge over the Sabi River, we were coming from the direction of the Maroela Loop, we had just past the S30 turn off on our left.

We saw a white 3 series BMW parked to the side of the road, right on the verge, it looked as if they had swerved, the woman in the passanger seat seemed to be leaning out of the window.....there was a troop of baboons haniging around and we said...first timers...must be the baboons they are so excited about (I love them too but these people seemed to be reacting more excitedly than normal) the bridge was ahead and we drove past them, as we passed I saw what the fuss was about, a huge male was sitting on their back seat!!! Arms spread out, the people were covering their heads with map books and trying to chase it out!!! I immediately had images of them being ripped apart by this baboon and that it would appear on the evening news..."couple attacked by baboon in Kruger"..they were terrified (I dont blame them) they tried to chase him out but he took swipes at their necks every time they flapped the books!

Next thing, the man jumped out with something shiny in his hand! I immediately thought it was a gun and suddenly changed my allegiance!!! Hes going to shoot it! Turns out he was holding something harmless to "protect himself with! His wife was climbing out the window! Eventually Mr Baboon took some fruit and left! We the saw them on the bridge, the poor people were shaking, we had a laugh afterwards...mostly about my wild imagination.

There is a serious side to this....this is what happens when visitors feed baboons, they become a danger to visitors and to themselves as they will surely be shot by Park's staff. Another lesson: Never leave your windows wide open around baboons!!!
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Unread post by adriaan » Mon Nov 28, 2005 9:27 am

we were in the shop once at skukuza were we saw a tourist taking closeup pics of the postcards in the shop. easy way to get a pic of the big5

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Unread post by Oumie » Wed Nov 30, 2005 7:24 am

On a nice hot sunny day we sat at the Orpen dam trying to cool off and watch some ellies drinking, when a tour guide and some Germans arrived. Well it was chaos: All of them scrambled to get a better view of the ellies blocking our view Well they all proceeded to take photo's Then buffs arrived and more photo's they were soo excited that they just clicked away at everything, even turned around at took photo's of us When they calmed down after the guide told them to please keep quiet and sit down, he noticed a lady next to me had her camera's lens cap on. He quietly came and told her, well then all hell broke loose She realised that she had the cap on all the time since they left their camp in the morning She jumped up and gave the poor guide such a "Klap" (smack) on his arm that he jumped with pain and asked why did she do such a silly thing She then told him (in german) that it was his fault he should have seen it earlier on and could have told her Then she started to cry The place was in total silence and the tour guide then came and sat next to us (he could see that we were laughing soo much (quietly) and proceeded to tell us this lady comes to Kruger once every 2 years doing exactly the same thing, forgetting to take off the cap.
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Unread post by Jumbo » Thu Dec 01, 2005 7:55 am

We've had several very funny experiences when we visit Kruger with my SO's Mozambican registered vehicle - we are Afrikaans speaking South Africans living in Mozambique. Some of the best ones were when we did a tour of Northern Kruger in September 2004.

It started off with us picking up a hat that was blown off from a tourist on a game-viewing vehicle. When we returned it to the guide, he very enthusiastically said, “Obrigado" (thanks in Portuguese). He then turned to the group of tourist and pompously proclaimed: “ These people are from Mozambique, and they only speak Portuguese over there"

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Unread post by christo » Sat Dec 31, 2005 11:32 pm

I am unsure how exactly the following started, but on the way from Lower Sabie to Skukuza we stopped for a troop of baboons. In front of us was a Kombi with open windows. As everyone in the kombi was looking to the one side, they did not notice the baboon getting in on the other side.

About 10m after they departed the Kombi stopped, all got out, baboon got out, all got in except one that needed to close the hatch at the back. Kombi departed and man on outside ran and shouted for at least 30m before he got the Kombi to stop and pick him up.

Having had frontrow seats to this event, we laughed so much, we could not even video it.
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Unread post by Wild@Heart » Tue Jan 03, 2006 6:53 am

Just out of interest sakes ...

The idea behind Leon Schuster's snake in the bag in the taxi trick could have been born from something a ranger ones did.

The story goes (and this is all true) that a adjoining KNP farmer phone the ranger as no one else wanted to assist. He caught a Caracal and the farmer being a wildlife lover could not shoot the cat. The dilema was that he could also not feed the cat as well. In desperation he phoned the ranger who immediately came over ... He darted the cat and place it in his vehicle. He did not realise it at the time, but the dart hit the cat's hipbone, hence it did not have the full effect. The ranger noticed the cat was starting to awaken and in fear of killing the cat with another dart he release the caracal there. Also knowing how sharp this cat's fangs are he decided to carry it in one of his suitcases.

Leaving the suitcase unlatched he left it next to the road and waited in the bushes for the Caracal to get out .. (remember, the suitcase is closed and not latched).

Well ... as SA Law would have it ... along came a Taxi and in true form when he noticed the bag he slammed the brakes as if there was another 100 passengers ready to get on ...

One of them jump out .. latched the suitcase and ran with it back to the Taxi ... The ranger was furious and set off to his vehicle to give chase..

But no need as 30 meters down the road all he could see was a taxi screeching to a halt and everyone popping out of windows doors and all ... the next moment the driver who was the last to leave popped out closely followed by the Caracal and both shot into different directions.

The ranger could not help but laugh...

© ... Taken from the Book but not word for word ... A Barrel of Laughs by Jan Roderigues

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Unread post by Oumie » Wed Jan 04, 2006 10:15 am

When SO was still a HR we decided to go to Skakuza early one morning, staying on the tar road. A few klm away we saw a old model Merc parked on the side of the road. SO then proceeded to drive even slower thinking they have seen something on the left, then stopped behind the vehicle to see what they see. Then the gentleman (much older gentleman) decided to get out of his vehicle and started walking toward the other side of the road facing the river (there was a mound right next to the river) SO then got out of our vehicle and asked him where is he going? He told SO he wants to go and see what is on the other side of the mound SO then told him to get back into his vehicle because there could be Lions or other dangerous animals behind the mound. He then got annoyed with SO and shouted "Hulle moet my dan maar eet " (They can then eat me if they want to)
SO then started to walk towards him to go and fine him when he turned around and told SO "because of you HR's that always spoil everything in the park for everybody, the people in the park cannot walk and do as they please"
Well SO carried on walking towards him, giving him a last stern warning to get back into his vehicle. He then climbed back into his vehicle mumbling under his breath and drove away.
SO and I laughed soo much after this incident all the way to Skakuza. When we got to the shop in Skakuza, who should be there is the same man and his wife. Well when he saw SO, he dropped his basket and steered his wife out of the shop We wondered when he was going to come back and buy what they needed after we left
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Croc bridge: 27/7/17 - 30/7/17
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Unread post by bert » Wed Jan 04, 2006 10:39 am

In the early 70ties with my parents in Kruger I found out that my dad wasn't the cool customer I thought he was. We drove in his pride and joy, a Hillman. On our way from Lower Sabie to Pretoriuskop on a dirt road the car came to a sudden stop. This just after we have witnessed a few hundred buffs crossing the road. The brave man got out of the car and
instructed my mom to be on full alert. With a wrench in hand he peeked into the engine, with a open car bonnet. His back turned to the world and his nose inside the car.

With a red face he appeared again, very nervous and wanted to give the keys to my mom so that she could start the car. He nearly broke his fingers in the process, cause all the windows were tightly shut.

At last the Hillman got on his way and the silence in the car was awesome, till we reached Skukuza and the AA.

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Unread post by wondercloak » Wed Jan 04, 2006 3:43 pm

Well I'd have to agree with earlier comments about GP numberplates...I did love growing up in Joburg but I'm glad to say that it's no longer home and the folks have migrated east to Nelspruit...the next task is getting their numberplates changed so I can ride without shame.

My favourite story is set in 2002, on the main road linking Skukuza & Lower Sabie. There were huge fires in the area at the time south of the road, west of Crocodile bridge.
We were watching kudu (beautiful) right by the road when a cig butt (stompie) comes flying out the window of a Toyota Venture in front. the car pulls away down the road and we pull forward & I pick up the microscopic death-trap..much to the obvious delight & applaud of a car full of big local boys, all with beer & cigarette in-hand themselves (but obviously more respect & infinite more common sense).
My girlfriend was driving which left me free to teach these idiots a lesson. We pulled up next to them in a river look-out spot and I motioned to the lady driving to put her window down..."the park's not a rubbish bin" I said as I handed over the butt. I swear I could smell burning and I'm sure it was the lady's brain, trying desperately to figure out what was going on. As she motioned towards me to take the butt I said "you dropped it back there, I saw you". Stuck between nervous laughter and idiocy she remained silent and didn't take the butt from me.
At this point, her husband in the back exploded with rage, but he couldn't get past his child who was sat in the seat in front. We drove off shortly after this, hoping but doubting that I'd managed to teach them something.
The manic swearing in front of the kids summed it all up i must say...dropping a cig butt mid-August in the park....well you'd may aswell throw a petrol-bomb at an elephant! The alcohol they were consuming must have blurred their vision of the black plumes of smoke billowing into the skies ahead...I wonder what caused that fire?
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Unread post by wildtuinman » Thu Jan 05, 2006 8:02 am

Well I had a funny experience with myself, which could have been told with great humour by forumite Bostokkelos aka BT had he decided to post more on the forums.

We camped at Satara in early 2000's. I, as always were in command of the braai and fire. Stacked wood so high that it looked like the Trojon Horse. Lit it and sat back with a cold lager in the hand looking at the hyaenas patrolling and lone ele bull feeding on the other side of the fence.

What a lovely fire it was. Rooibos wood. The best! Even BT couldn't help to let out a very seldom heard praise on my firemaking abilities.

For those who know the braais there, will know that the grill can be swung around 180deg. Well it was like that so that all the wood could fit into the braai.

As the wood started burning out and forming coals, I swung the grill back to burn all sorts of germs to the next millenium.

Then I did the unthinkable, forgetting that the grill handle was in the fire, a fire so hot that it melt gold 2 meters away. Yip BT's gold front teeth went missing.

I touched the handle with my hand. It burnt me to a crescendo! BT LHAO!! Fell of his camping chair and crawled on the Satara dust floor. I sung like a blackbreasted canary on a hot afternoon.

The grill was open. 25mins later, after treating my hand with ice and "bottle ropes" the descending wood weight equalled out the grill weight and it topped over with the grill being top heavy. I jumped up and did what? Grabbed the gril again with the same hand...

By this time BT wet his pants! He was lying next to the fence laughing like a hyaena with a zebra TBone all for himself. People ran from far to check out the hyaena kill after they heard him LHAO and me screaming like a warthog piglet with a leopard around his throat.

It burned me numb, but later that evening whilst trying to sleep in felt like 6 Gestapo men were amputating my hand with a dull block hammer.

Very funny for him. not so much for me. Aaww BT, what great times we had in Kruger. You better get back here quickly buddy. We need to go again...
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Unread post by Elsa » Thu Jan 05, 2006 4:11 pm

What is it about us humans that cause such mirth when some one else hurts themselves, don't get me wrong, I do as well, so what is it about us?
Maybe we are glad that it was'nt us

We once saw a oldish guy at the LS day visitors restaurant walk up to the fence and grab hold of the wire, well, don't let anybody tell you that its not "live wire stuff", he managed to let go but sank to his knees and then staggered up and when he saw that we were watching, he stuffed his hand in his pockets and tried to walk as nonchalantly, as his legs would allow, I suspect away.
Anytime one of us thought of it we would start giggling and set the others off again!!
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