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I've read a couple of times that the wilderness camps and their access roads are only for those with accommodation booked there. How about roads like the loop across the Auob on the way to Urikaruus. Can I drive this? Can I drive up to the camp for a look at the waterhole?
Absolutely NOT

Unless you want a hefty fine. The wilderness camps are posted "residents only", so if you're not staying there, you are trespassing ...
Sorry to jump on you

but this is one of my bugbears -- there is nothing worse than paying a premium to stay in a wilderness camp only to find you are actually at Picadilly Circus with all the traffic
There are lookout points along the Auob -- one in fact is just north of Urikaruus.
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Also there is another trail I can see starting at 26 22 06 S, 20 41 50 E. It ends at Auchterlony. Can I drive this or is this the trail that was mentioned in other older threads where you register first at TR if you want to do it.
This sounds like the Leeudril 4X4 trail -- which you book first at twee Rivieren.
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Can anyone suggest any loops to do from Nossob and Mata mata or do people normally just follow the two river beds. Sometimes it's nice just to get away from traffic. Also we are spending 3 days in Nossob and 3 or 4 in Mata mata so we don't want to drive the same circuit every day.
From Nossob you have 2 choices -- north or south

If you choose south, you can then choose whether or not to do Marie's Loop

Folk usually just drive off to a water-hole like Marie's or Kwang or, or and park off to see what appears.
From MataMata you only have one choice -- south

You do then have a choice at each waterhole as to whether you want to do the loop past the waterhole or not.
Otherwise that's pretty much it. But don't think you'll see the same things on the way back as you saw on the way there -- animals move around
Enjoy !