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Scariest
Whilst most of my scary moments relate to being mock charged by eliphants, my scariest moment was driving to sirheni and disturbing a mating pair of Lions. The male lion gave chased my car, at which time I realised my fully open sun roof would not close. I had thoughts of The Lion pulling me and my girlfriend out of the sun roof. Fortunately he gave up the chase but my uncontrollable shakes lasted a lot longer.

Dumbest
Seeing a Hyena on the unfenced perimeter of Afsaal picnic site. It was close to people so I decdied to shoo it away which worked. I had been told a Hyena was scared of anything taller than it, A ranger later that day told me that this was just a fallacy.

Funniest
Walking the perimeter of Bergendaal at night in front of my girlfriend and daughter who were petrified of snakes. I had advised them that I was like a camel man and feared nothing. Eventually I came across a snake, and in my efforts to jump back as far as possible I inadvertently during this process pushed them closer to the danger. The snake turned out to be a piece of red and white caution tape left behind by people fixing the path. I was tremendously shaken and embarrassed, I also receieved the nickname from them which is mouse man rather than camel man.

Scariest
Even though we have been trapped by elephants twice on roads where there was simply no escape route available (S120 and S50)our number one most scariest happened last year.

We were at a lion sighting when it started to get crowded. A safari operator pulled up and told us that there were a couple of white rhinos a few km further up. We decided to check them out and leave the male lion alone. About a km further up we were delighted to see a male, a female and a young black rhino. It was our first sighting ever of this magnificent beast and we decided to sit around for a while. The male was behind a bush out of view but the mother and calf where in plain view. After taken plenty of pictures we decided to move forward a bit and take some pictures of the male considering that the calf was getting very nervous. As soon as the male saw us he didn’t hesitate and came for us . My dad hit the acceleration as hard as he could leaving the rhino family quickly behind us.

The most funniest thing must of happened about a minute later when a bright yellow Nissan micra came from the other direction. We waved him down and warned him that there were three black rhinos but that the male was extremely protective and had already charged us off. The young American said it was his first visit to the park and was really up for this encounter . Wishing him luck we drove off again laughing because we don’t think he realized what for trouble he was driving towards, considering a white Nissan x-trail already angered the rhino let alone a bright little yellow Nissan micra .

In 22 visit to Kruger there have been quite a few of both, but the first of each that comes to mind......

Funny.
In 1992, long before I became a birder, and when NOBODY drove between camps when the gates were closed, we were the first car down 'Eloff Street' from Skuk and came across 3 lions sleepng on the road. After waking & doing their ablutions, they walked down the road past our car into the following hordes. We drove off as the rest stayed to see what the lions would do.
About 15 minutes later we rounded a bend and saw a lioness jogging away from us and I killed the engine as we saw another and a lion chasing an impala in our direction. Seeing the 'first' lioness, the impala veered off the road right into the jaws of another lioness and the other 3 each grabbed a piece and the hapless impala was rent asunder.
After we had gathered our composure, the lions were lying around and vultures started to arrive. We decided to backtrack and we came across a car stopped. We told them about the lions, and they were quite disinterested until we said they would recognise the spot by the vultures present. "VULTURES!" the American driver yelled and they were off like shot from a cannon!

Scariest (also very funny)
Circa 1956 when there were no tar roads and not as many picnic spots, after driving around a bit, my mother needed the loo. We were not near any, and she made my dad stop. I was told to open my door and she opened hers and as she squatted my brother and I were told to look for animals in the opposite direction. After a few seconds my dad yelled "Get back in and shut the *&$&*^$&*$ doors". I obeyed instantly and my mum was back inside in a flash. My dad had seen, blending into the dry winter grass, a lioness a few metres behind my mum, and when she got back inside, another 2!

Wow BB! That's a very close encounter!

As in BB's case, I can say that in all the trips since about 1961 (which is the first I can remember) there have been quite a few memorable moments; many of the scary ones were also quite funny.

Ones that stand out:
Scary: This was about 25 years ago, one of the first times my wife and I went to the park after we got married. I had a VW Kombi (about 1978 model) which had the disturbing habit of not wanting to start again if the engine was stopped after running for a while (so when it was hot). The problem was that the starter motor did not want to engage, and the only way of getting it to start was to whack the solenoid with a spanner while someone turned the ignition on (and held it on). The solution to this problem was, of course, to not switch off the engine. One day, near Shingwedzi, on a loop near the river, we stopped, and I switched off the engine without thinking. After about an hour it became clear that the only alternative was going to be getting out (illegally) and whacking the solenoid (this was way before cellphones and we had not seen another car). This meant getting out of the car and sliding in underneath the car near the rear wheel on the driver's side (the rear sliding door was on the other side of the Kombi, so the closest door was the driver's door). My wife was in the driver's seat and I was out through the rear door like a flash, round the car and underneath. Yelling to my wife to start the car I started banging the solenoid, nothing happened. I eventually got up (now much calmer), walked to the drivers door; window wound firmly up. Turns out my wife could not hear me yelling from underneath the car. Anyhow, communication now re-established, I was back underneath the car, and the banging the solenoid routine got the car started. Quite blase by this point, I strolled around the Kombi to the passenger door; dusting myself off as I went...as I reached the door I looked to my left, and there, in the shade of a Mopani bush was lioness looking at me curiously. This was about 30 meters from the car. I remember going absolutely cold. This was the first and the last time I have ever gotten out of my car in the KNP..

Funny: There have been some moments, but one that stands out happened in Skukuza. My youngest son was about 4 years old, and he was throwing around a tennis ball outside the hut. We suddenly heard this ear-piercing scream and rushed outside...there he was confronting a warthog that was sniffing at his tennis ball...

Many of the other amusing moments have been supplied by conversations around the campfire of neighbouring huts, getting progressively louder around the evening wore on. I remember one rather portly gent in a Bulls rugby shirt asserting quite loudly that he did "not rate Bryan Habana at all" and that he "could have scored any of the tries Habana scored at the 2007 world cup" himself...