Again I thank you all for your concerns, prayers, emails and support and so many emails that I cant get to you all…, I dont want to single ppl out as you have been all so great and kind to me, but I have to say a few thank you’s to those who really made such a difference…MIL (jaycee) you know how much this meant to me…how I loved bringing Kruger to ppl, how I loved showing you my daily life..something I cant do in Doha…VVSG and M..you have gone out of your way so many times to help me, came when I needed you, been absolutly great friends, I will never forget you…Mavis, Green Widow, so glad that I met you too…I wish that you will have the courage, endurance and drive to do it as well..really think that you can! Annette (click click) for your help that day when it all fell apart…you have been great and is still great help to me now…With this my last farewell and also to tell you why I had to leave Kruger!
I have been quiet for the last 10days or so, giving many of you concerns and heartache…but, I had to fly back to Doha..and arrived safely after about a 2hr delay due to a storm…Im not a good flyer in good conditions…but a storm, I would rather stay on the ground, but today I had to take my chances as I really needed to get back home! I had a lot on my mind and needed time to think and put our lives back into perspective..hope you can understand that!
This will also be my last contribution to the Sanparks Forum…crowned Sanparks Champion of the year..I really needed to make it through…but then…I have done it…and I cant continue..and hope that the next one crowned can make you proud!
As we have been going to Kruger for so many years, I truly believed that I could make a difference in so many lives….but then….first the forums, who made me plan and realize my dream and then the blog…..became my life! A decision I dont regret…but a decision I wish I gave more thought to!
‘With this my last day in Kruger..and how the male lions performed….really needed to tell me something I knew but ignored…
These 2 beautifull males in the road…he gave me such sad look…and I should have stopped to look and listened…
And this one licking his lips….maybe telling me a meal was waiting at home…but then…
with his head in the trees/bush telling me there is no place like home!
So on the 22nd Jan at 2:00pm, my life fell apart and with that the feeling came that I have neglected my family…How many times did “Engel” call and I would say “Sorry Engel cant talk now as I have visitors” or…Sorry Engel cant talk now as Im busy with the blog….No matter where in the world he was, what the time difference was…he still waited and called!!! Megan is planning her wedding…and all I had to say to her was….”Megan, I dont have time for this, Im in Kruger to Live My Dream, not Plan a Wedding!!” How wrong could I have been as a wife and a mother!
Those, both Stephen and the girls that have supported me throughout were dissapoionted by me and I can only blame myself, no one else! All because I became so obsessed with Living My Dream, I failed to see what I was doing to them!
Believe me, this “journey” I set out on did change my life…I have been such a “hard” person believing in whats right is right, and whats wrong is wrong..but now I know that life is not like that..there is grey inbetween…No one is perfect…and learning a very hard way, realized not even me!
My decision to leave Kruger came as no surprise or shock to me, as I have known for a few weeks before that what I was doing to those who loved and cared for me was wrong as I did not appreciate the effort and loneliness they had to endure! Although I brought Kruger to you on an almost daily basisI have succeeded in Living My Dream, …but I have neglected to see the feelings and emotions of those so close and dear to me and today, I must say I have failed!
I hope that we and you can get strenght from my mistakes and take our and your lives to greater heights…and I truly do believe that you can “Live Your Dream”! Please learn from my mistakes..and make it work!
With that the last from me…
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